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Exercise: modal auxiliaries can, could, may and might 5

Exercise on how to use can, could, may and might to ask permission or offer something.

Explanation of can, could, may, might with permission and offering...

We use modal auxiliaries to ask permission or offer to do something for somebody . If there are two auxiliaries in brackets ( ), choose the correct one. Follow the example.

Example: You want me to show you the answers. You ask... (May/Could)

Could you show me     the answers, please?

1) You want me to help you with your homework. You ask... (Can/May)

with my homework, please?

2) You want me to buy you a beer. You ask... (May/Could)

a beer, please?

3) You offer me a cigar. You ask... (May)

you a cigar?

4) You want to see my stamp collection. You ask... (Can)

your stamp collection, please?

5) You want to ask me my age. You ask...  (Might)

you your age, please?

6) You offer to introduce me to your family. You ask... (May)

to my family?

7) You want to come on holiday with me. You ask... (Can)

on holiday with you?

8) You want to ask me how much I earn. You ask... (Might)

you how much you earn?

9) You offer to do the washing-up. You ask... (Can)

the washing-up?

10) You want to open the window. You ask... (Could)

the window?

Solutions and help...

Notice that might is only used for very delicate questions like in numbers, 5 and 8.

1) Can you help me with my homework, please?

2) Could you buy me a beer, please?

3) May I offer you a cigar? / May I give you a cigar?

4) Can I see your stamp collection, please?

5) Might I ask you your age, please?

6) May I introduce you to my family?

7) Can I come on holiday with you?

8) Might I ask you how much you earn?

9) Can I do the washing-up? / Can I offer to do the washing-up?

10) Could I open the window?

Listen and read about modal auxiliaries used for polite language...

Index of English exercises... (return to same section)

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Reported Speech Exercise: Requests And Commands

Reported speech exercises | reporting requests and commands, transform these requests and commands into reported speech (start the sentence as suggested.), related materials.

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Home of English Grammar

Reported speech worksheet

Sentences are given in direct speech. Change them into indirect speech.

1. The teacher said to the boys, ‘Have you done your homework?’

2. The little girl asked the man, ‘Will you help me?’

3. Janaki said, ‘I have been reading this book.’

4. Mother said to the daughter, ‘Go and change your dress.’

5. Susie said, ‘I had read this book before I gave it to you.’

6. Mike said, ‘I will bring my piano.’

7. The officer told the clerk, ‘Bring me that file.’

8. Jane asked, ‘Have you read that book?’

9. Malathi asked, ‘Where is your watch?’

10. Sophia said, ‘I watched this movie last week.’

11. Mother asked, ‘What is the matter?’

12. Shyam said, ‘I can solve this problem.’

1. The teacher asked the boys if they had done their homework.

2. The little girl asked the man if he would help her.

3. Janaki said that she had been reading that book.

4. Mother told the daughter to go and change her dresses.

5. Susie said that she had read that book before she gave it to me.

6. Mike said that he would bring his piano.

7. The officer told the clerk to bring him that file.

8. Jane asked if I had read that book.

9. Malathi asked where my watch was.

10. Sophia said that she had watched that movie the previous week.

11. Mother asked what the matter was.

12. Shyam said that he could solve that problem .

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How Parents Can Help With Homework (Without Taking Over)

Sometimes taking the stress out of homework means taking a step back. learn how to curb your hands-on habits and help your kids do their best..

After a long day at school, the last thing my kids want to do is tackle their assignments. And after a long day at work, arguing with them about homework is the last thing my husband and I want to do. But we’ve always thought that the more involved we were, the better off they’d be.

It turns out that that isn’t necessarily true: After looking at 30 years’ worth of studies, researchers concluded that in most cases, such parental interest actually doesn’t help raise test scores or grades — and sometimes backfires. The reason: When parents are overly immersed in homework, they deny kids the chance to become more independent and confident. Worse, it can breed anxiety along the way.

Of course, backing off is easier said than done. So we asked education pros to share their secrets for helping kids study without hovering. Use these techniques to bring peace to your evenings — starting tonight!

Old way:  Sit beside your child so you can answer questions and fix his mistakes. New way:  Stay available by doing chores nearby.

When you hover, you essentially send the message to your kid that you don’t think he can do the work. To empower him instead, stay busy and wait until he asks for your help, says Miriam Liss, Ph.D., author of Balancing the Big Stuff: Finding Happiness in Work, Family, and Life.

For example, say your child is stumped by a math problem. You could ask questions (“So how many groups of two equal eight?”). If he says, “Got it,” leave him alone. If he continues to struggle, make suggestions (“Hey, do you want to use baby carrots as manipulatives?”). He’ll feel a greater sense of accomplishment if he’s worked for the answer mostly on his own.

Also avoid stepping in to correct every mistake without your child’s input. “Homework is a chance for a child to practice what he’s learned in class,” explains Jacqueline Cross, a fourth-grade teacher in Hingham, MA. “If he’s really challenged by long division, I’d like to know that so I can help.”

If your child asks you to look over his worksheet, point out the errors in a subtle way. Say, “Can you go back and see where you went wrong here?” or even do a quick reminder of the point of the exercise (“Remember, you’re supposed to be finding coins that add up to four dollars. Want to count these numbers out loud and I’ll listen?”).

Old way:  Nag until your child starts working. New way:  Set up a no-nonsense routine.

“Make it clear that everyone has obligations — and your child’s include things like going to school, working with her teacher, and doing the best she can on her homework,” says Susan Kuczmarski, Ed.D, author of The Sacred Flight of the Teenager: A Parent’s Guide to Stepping Back and Letting Go.

Doing her best includes buckling down to finish her assignments without constant check-ins from you. Together, figure out a specific time and place for her to work. It’s okay if she needs a little while to recharge after school before starting, but be sure she knows that four o’clock (or whatever time is best for your fam) is non-negotiable.

Once you’ve established a firm homework routine, make it a habit that happens every day. “Kids can whine, but they just won’t get to watch their TV show or whatever else they’d like to do until the homework is done. Period,” says Dr. Liss. (There goes your need to nag!)

And if your kid doesn’t do an assignment because you failed to remind her? As tough as it is, let her deal with the consequences. You won’t always be around to stay on top of her, and learning responsibility is a cornerstone of education.

Old way:  Lecture your kid for waiting until the night before to study for the spelling test. New way:  Teach time-management skills.

Scolding just makes your child feel bad (and he’ll tune you out, anyway). But because kids appreciate structure, teach yours how to break tasks up into more manageable chunks.

A printed calendar is a great tool for learning how to map out deadlines and a better visual reminder for grade-schoolers than the digital kind. Hang it in a prominent place. Then help your kid set daily goals, like “study four words on Monday and five on Tuesday …,” or break that science project into weekly goals, like “gather resources by the 5th, plant the seeds on the 11th.”

By giving your child control over deadlines, you remove yourself from the battle: If it’s on the calendar, he’s responsible for it. Skip handing out negative consequences for not getting things done. Instead, says Dr. Liss, you can offer him rewards for hitting each of the milestones.

Old way:  Get sucked into whine fests. New way:  Walk away.

If your child gripes about the work itself (“It’s too hard!” or “I don’t get it!”), figure out what’s behind her frustration. If it’s a lack of motivation, let her know that the sooner she applies herself, the sooner it’ll get done and the faster she can move on to something more fun. Then leave the room. After all, without an audience, she can’t complain, and you avoid getting trapped in a negative cycle.

But if the material is too difficult, that’s another story. In that case, try your hand at doing some of the problems with her (as long as you can stay calm). You may be able to make that lightbulb turn on in her head.

If not, reach out to the teacher to ask for assistance (or, if your child is over 8, suggest she speak with the teacher herself). Educators don’t want their students struggling to the point of tears, so your child’s teacher will probably be happy to clue you in to extra resources that can help your kid understand the lesson.

Old way:  Work on your kid’s project until the end product is perfect. New way:  Let your child take the lead.

“We assign projects so kids get a chance to apply new skills they’ve learned,” Cross explains. So if you’re getting super hands-on to wow the teacher, do your best to resist the urge. “We see your child every day, so we’re pretty familiar with the kind of work she does!” Cross adds.

That doesn’t mean you can’t pitch in, but let your kid be the creative force. For example, if you notice that the assignment includes a timeline and your grade-schooler skipped that step, point it out, then let her figure out which dates to include and how best to showcase them. After all, brainstorming lets your child hone her problem-solving skills and increases her confidence; hand-feeding her a solution won’t teach her anything.

When your kiddo proudly shows you the finished product, tell her something specific, like “Your report really makes me want to read that book now!” or “Wow, look at all the details you included in that flower diagram!” By saying something descriptive instead of generic (“That poster you made looks really awesome!”), you’re acknowledging the content itself and the effort your child put into it rather than just how it looks, notes Dr. Kuczmarski.

Achieving balance is key — and that’s true for all homework conundrums. Says Dr. Liss: “Your goal is to find that sweet spot of being there if your kids need you, but not being totally on top of them all the time.”

Plus: 10 Homework Help Tips The Do's and Don'ts of Homework Help

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"Could you please help me" vs "Could you help me please"

When asking for something politely which sentence is a better/proper choice?

Could you please help me?

Could you help me please?

• phrase-choice

• 3 Please Note: There may not be a definitive answer to this question, but I think it still has value. The answer may be complex, context-based, including non-verbal communication, relationship and situation between speaker and listener, etc. Each answer gives a different perspective. For this question, one may learn some good ideas by reading all the answers rather than any one.** –  CoolHandLouis Commented Feb 28, 2014 at 1:07

9 Answers 9

On my polite-o-meter , the two sentences score very close: "Could you help me, please?", "Could you please help me?". The former sounds more formal. Use whichever one you want and you'll be more polite than most people.

The following data is a very rough indication that "please-on-the-end" might be more common: 1

Google Search "Could you help me*please" : 40,000,000 results.

Google Search "Could you please help me*" : 11,000,000 results.

1 Google results may not be accurate at all. I will be reviewing this. Another answer suggests a different result.

Sentence structure has an impact on information emphasis:

Sentence length tends to require "please" to be moved to the beginning. Consider the following: "Could you help me find my light-brown work shoes that I just bought, please? " "Could you please help me find my light-brown work shoes that I just bought?" The latter introduces politeness earlier while also focusing the sentence on the important information.

Other answers in this thread provide great analyses on formality and urgency. But length-of-sentence can be an opposing force. While "please" tends to be more formal and polite at the end of sentences, a longer sentence may be more natural sounding with "please" moved closer to the beginning. For more information, see Google Search: sentence information, clarity, and focus.

How to learn all of this?

• There are a lot of great answers in this thread (I suggest you read them too!), but that can be overwhelming! Usage is highly dependent on context. Rather than trying to learn 1000 rules on usage, I suggest that you gain subtle usage skills naturally through observation and experience .

• 4 Google's result estimates aren't real data. They don't even try to make them accurate. I'm afraid your 40M and 11M numbers should be discarded rather than taken with a grain of salt. –  user230 Commented Feb 28, 2014 at 2:19

There are a lot of subtleties hidden in the different words and word orders mentioned here. Changing the place in the sentence of the word please changes its emphasis; roughly, the earlier the word comes in the sentence, the stronger the request for help. Notice RayB's point that putting please at the end of the sentence sounds more polite. This is because it's a bit less insistent.

Context is very important as well; a more insistent request for help can go with a more pressing need for it and not be impolite. If for example, a child came up to a stranger and said "Could you please help me? I'm lost." the child would probably be thought of as very well-mannered, keeping a cool head in a frightening situation. On the other hand, if a shopper asked a clerk "could you please help me?" instead of "could you help me, please?" it would typically convey a sense of irritation at having been made to wait too long. I say typically because one can always use tone of voice to change this.

Now, "would you help me, please" sounds bit less insistent to me than using could, I suppose because it's asking if one is willing to help rather than if one is able to. "Won't you help me" usually doesn't go with "please" since it is really asking if the person is unwilling to help even though he should. (Edit: I note the exception to this of "won't you pleeease, please help me" from the Beatles song mentioned in another answer. When you do use won't you please in this sense, it is particularly insistent. There's a flavor almost of begging in the song.)

A funny story comes to mind. I used to know a guy who had spent a number of years as a fisherman in Maine, and he told this story. One evening, he was in the boathouse with some of his friends, and the radio came on:

Jim? Hey, Phil, what's up? Not much. You doing anything right now? Nope, just sitting here with Joe and George. Well, could you stop out and pick me up, please? Sure, where are you? About three miles out, taking on water.

The reason it's funny is because the level of insistence for help was way less than the need for it.

• 3 +1 On this answer. I really like your analysis on context. And I'm sure you'll agree that even "Won't you please help me" expresses yet another sentiment exactly because they "don't go together" as you said. And that's a great story. The guy on the sinking boat uses the formal, cool-headed, non-insistent form of "please" because he is cool-headed and most likely has a great sense of perspective and humor about life. I learned much from your answer, thanks! –  CoolHandLouis Commented Feb 27, 2014 at 20:00
• 3 "roughly, the earlier the word comes in the sentence, the stronger the request for help" I don't think that's at all true. "Please could you help me?", "Could you please help me?" and "Could you help me please?" when spoken in a fairly neutral tone are all simple requests for help; when spoken with strong emphasis on "please", all can sound equally desperate. –  David Richerby Commented Feb 27, 2014 at 23:01
• 2 @David: Perhaps you missed "I say typically because one can always use tone of voice to change this." in my answer? (It is kind of buried in there.) I completely agree with you about the use of tone to vary the meaning here, and you have provided some useful elaborations on this point. However, I stand by my assertion that we also use word order to do the same. One doesn't preclude the other. –  BobRodes Commented Feb 28, 2014 at 15:10
• +1 on BobRodes positive response ("I completely agree with you..."). Good Answerists/Commenters model and encourage positive tone and civility for the community. –  CoolHandLouis Commented Feb 28, 2014 at 21:21

Politeness is not inherent in the grammar. Politeness is an attitude implied by the speaker and inferred by the hearer, and the two are not always aligned.

The choice of which grammatical construct to use will vary across cultures and sub-cultures. In South African English, for instance, "please" is very commonly placed at the beginning of a request, and because that placement is normal, the level of insistence discussed in other answers is reduced.

The politeness implied by a South African speaker might be misunderstood as insistence by some American hearers.

• +1 This is an excellent point. Such a simple question can lead to many "opinion" answers (and it's not easy to divide opinion from "fact"). –  CoolHandLouis Commented Feb 28, 2014 at 0:55

I personally think "Could you help me, please?" sounds more polite.

However, in this situation I would say "Would you mind helping me, please?". In my opinion it sounds friendlier to the person you're asking.

There are very good answers that discuss the significance of the position of please. Here, I only discuss:

some basic analysis using google's n-gram viewer and COCA (Corpus of Contemporary American English)

the shift with time of the preferred location of please (with a bonus link to song by the Beatles; credit for this link should go to Emilio Pisanty)

1. Basic Analysis using English Corpora

To answer questions like that, one could use Google's n-gram viewer. See here where I've compared three possibilities:

• please could you help me?
• could you help me please?
• could you please help me?

Although all of them sound good to me, books for English language learners seem to prefer the latter.

In the comments, Damkerng T reports that similar results are observed in COCA :

• could you please help me (6 hits)
• could you help me please (0 hits)
• could you help me , please (0 hits)
• please could you help me (0 hits)
• please , could you help me (4 hits)
• can you please help me (5 hits)
• can you help me , please (3 hits)
• can you help me please (1 hit)

And the corresponding search on Goggle's n-gram viewer yields similar results:

• please can you help me?
• can you help me please?
• can you please help me?

That is, occurrences of all the three forms can be found, with the latter being slightly more frequent.

Also in the comments, CoolHandLouis makes a number of points about the limitations of carrying out basic searches of English corpora:

"Could you please help me" may include results "could you please help me [subordinate clause]." That adds more results here.

"Could you help me, please?" requires context. In spoken language, context can comes from environment. Mom carries groceries & asks hubby "Could you help me, please?" But on Internet, questions contain context: "Could you help me with this sentence, please?" So "Could you help me, please?" would be under-represented in written text and some types of corpus searches.

2. Preferred Location of the Courtesy Marker please

Fátima María Faya-Cerqueiro observes in New Trends and Methodologies in Applied English Language Research that the preferred position of please has shifted with time:

"The preferred position of please by the nineteenh century was clause-initial, as it is customary for imperative constructions [...] Final position was a later development."

She argues that the courtesy marker please originated from the imperative expression be pleased to , that evolved into the imperative expression please to , and finally became the courtesy marker please .

This origin could also explain the preferred location of please in questions. One could argue that the question corresponding to the following imperative construct:

• Be pleased to help me
• Are you pleased to help me?

or more politely:

• Would you be pleased to help me?

which is closer to the Beatles :

• Won't you please please help me?

• 3 To my surprise, I found a similar conclusion in COCA, could you please help me : 6 hits, could you help me please : 0 hit, could you help me , please : 0 hit, please could you help me : 0 hit, please , could you help me : 4 hits, can you please help me : 5 hits, can you help me , please : 3 hits, can you help me please : 1 hit. –  Damkerng T. Commented Feb 27, 2014 at 14:35
• 2 @DamkerngT - The surprise may be explained as "Could you help me, please?" is more often natural spoken dialog, and under-represented in written form. Also, "Could you please help me" may include extended forms like "Could you please help me with the following question?" –  CoolHandLouis Commented Feb 27, 2014 at 17:32
• The Beatles were extra polite: "Won't you please, please help me?" : ) –  CoolHandLouis Commented Feb 27, 2014 at 19:16
• 1 I've removed this info from my answer since its more appropriately addressed here in a comment. (1) "Could you please help me" may include results "could you please help me [subordinate clause]." That adds more results here. (2) "Could you help me, please?" requires context. In spoken language, context can comes from environment. Mom carries groceries & asks hubby "Could you help me, please?" But on Internet, questions contain context: "Could you help me with this sentence, please?" So "Could you help me, please?" would be under-represented in written text and some types of corpus searches. –  CoolHandLouis Commented Feb 28, 2014 at 0:37
• I might suggest a switch: that primary data is the main answer and historical information is secondary answer. –  CoolHandLouis Commented Feb 28, 2014 at 0:50

As I see it, where the please is in the sentence actually changes its meaning, ranging from a polite request to a near supplication.

• could you help me, please? -> polite request
• could you please help me? -> added notion of some kind of urgency (and potentially exasperation: this is typically an form you could see when asking for the second time, after having asked with the first form, e.g. could you help me, please? , and later on if you got no answer, could you please help me? )
• please, could you help me? -> there's a huge emphasis on the please turning the question nearly into a supplication for help.

Comparing the occurrences of all three forms might give the right result only if we assume they have the same meaning, which I believe they don't.

Anyway, that's my 2c as a foreigner who learned English more in its strict older written form than in its day to day form.

• 1 It's possible to put "please" at the start of the sentence without being at all insistent. Tone of voice is much more significant than the position of "please" in the sentence. –  David Richerby Commented Feb 27, 2014 at 23:05
• 1 +1 on @DavidRicherby's comment. Sentence structure may have some effect, but tone and other "non-verbal" (i.e. "non-lexical" which includes tone, volume, body language) language elements carries the bulk of the emotional/attitude informmation content. DavidR, btw, I didn't mean to offend in my comment to you under BobRodes' answer. –  CoolHandLouis Commented Feb 28, 2014 at 19:40
• @CoolHandLouis No offence taken! –  David Richerby Commented Feb 28, 2014 at 22:15

I am from the US, and when I went to England I was surprised to hear people say "Please would you ..." because it actually sounded rather like begging, and I was an outsider with low status. When my Guru said it though, I thought: well, that must be the most correct way - put the politeness right at the start. English allows a multitude of forms and words, with subtle nuances that come and go in varying places over time. Sometimes errors creep in, like people saying "jealous" when they mean "envious" (they are opposites). I guess there is no substitute for paying close attention and giving people the benefit of the doubt. (Or is that a subtle idiomatic phrase?)

Both are possible.

Could you help me, please? (A comma should be put before 'please')

We can leave out 'please'. Could you please help me.

We can also use would you mind + ing-form) and would you like + to-infinitive

[ We can ask someone to do something by saying could you ... ]

In my opinion, I would say:

Please, could you help?

Although it is human nature and in the English language to soften our words with adverbs in order to appear more polite, it's up to you how you would like to use it.

Remember, you can always exercise your right to use an adverb.

• Thank you for your participation. The quality of this answer could be improved by using (1) better English grammar and punctuation, and (2) providing more detail and examples. –  CoolHandLouis Commented Feb 27, 2014 at 21:27

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The New York Times

The learning network | how much do your parents help with your homework.

How Much Do Your Parents Help With Your Homework?

Questions about issues in the news for students 13 and older.

• See all Student Opinion »

What’s the homework situation in your family? How much do your parents help with your homework? And in what ways?

Room for Debate recently asked whether parents should help their children with their homework or whether they end up doing more harm than good.

Experts weighed in with varying opinions.

Erika A. Patall, an assistant professor of educational psychology, writes:

When it comes to helping with homework, education and psychology research suggests that it all depends on how parents become involved. What is essential is that parents focus on supporting students’ motivation. Parent help can backfire when it involves providing instruction on homework content. In contrast, parents will support their kids’ school success when they communicate clear expectations and help students develop a homework routine. Students who have a clearly defined routine around homework — a set time, a set place and a set way to complete homework — are more likely to believe they can overcome challenges while doing homework, take more responsibility for learning, and ultimately do better in school. Homework is an especially good opportunity for parents to help young kids develop self-regulatory skills, by modeling study strategies and helping students set goals and make plans for completing homework. Parents should also give kids autonomy. When kids struggle with homework, parents sometimes have an instinct to take control by using commands, incentives, threats, surveillance, or just doing the work themselves. These tactics may work in the short term, but won’t benefit kids in the long run.

Martha Brockenbrough, a former high school teacher and the author of books for young readers, writes:

My daughters are 10 and 14. Once upon a time, I did everything for them. Then they learned and took over. This is a core principle of parenthood for me: If my kids can do it themselves, I don’t do it for them. My daughters sometimes wear questionable outfits and pack questionable lunches. Likewise, they’ve handed in homework that’s less than perfect. And this might look like incompetence, but when I see it, I see learning in progress. The principle seems to work equally well for all kinds of kids. One of my girls has learning disabilities and is in a private school that specializes in such things. The other is working two years ahead academically in a public school. Both have learned they prefer better grades and fewer corrections on their homework, so both do it carefully and on time.

Students: Read the entire article, then tell us …

— How much do your parents help with your homework? What kind of help do they provide?

— Do they help you develop a homework routine? Do they help motivate you and provide assistance when you ask?

— Do they ever use commands, incentives, threats or surveillance? Do they ever do the work themselves?

— Has the way your parents have supported you with homework changed as you have gotten older? Did they handle homework differently when you were in elementary school, for example?

— Does homework ever cause conflict in your family? How so?

— Are you happy with the way your parents support you with your homework? Or do you wish they would handle it differently? Why?

Students 13 and older are invited to comment below. Please use only your first name. For privacy policy reasons, we will not publish student comments that include a last name.

Comments are no longer being accepted.

– How much do your parents help with your homework? What kind of help do they provide?

Very little, and usually only when I asked. Unfortunately, despite both my parents being graduated, they had a tendency to do my work for me, especially in mathematics, and be rather impatient when I did not understand how they had done it.

– Do they help you develop a homework routine? Do they help motivate you and provide assistance when you ask?

They didn’t help; Until I entered 5th grade, when I was 11, I stayed the entire day at school, barely seeing my parents. The school caretakers, after the normal classes, helped us do homework. After my 5th grade, I had the morning for classes and then returned home. But, see, my father developed a thyroid condition in that year and had to be medicated heavily, which kept him asleep for most of the day, while my mother worked from 7am to 11pm. Both unable to reinforce any schedule, plus in that same year my school had financial problems which rebounded in teachers not passing homework and the whole administration was failing.

– Do they ever use commands, incentives, threats or surveillance? Do they ever do the work themselves?

They used to, and it left me frustrated because although the work was done, I didn’t understand a thing. Humanities were easier, because I could understand by reading a bit more, but mathematics and related– such as physics– I had to ask multiple times. My father had a doctorate in physics, but I hesitated to ask him for help as he usually explained something that went way over my head, and my mother had the tendency to take the notebook from my hands to do it herself, and not understand how I couldn’t grasp it.

– Has the way your parents have supported you with homework changed as you have gotten older? Did they handle homework differently when you were in elementary school, for example?

I don’t think so, as I stopped asking them. I find studying alone better, but it leaves a lot of gaps, especially in math.

– Does homework ever cause conflict in your family? How so?

It did, as it affected my grades. From that 5th grade (my 11 years) onwards, I couldn’t concentrate or didn’t have enough discipline to sit at home and make my homework. I also had problems remembering I had homework, as I couldn’t pay much attention in class. Usually, reaching the end of a bimester or trimester, where there were parent reunions and distribution of grades, my mother returned completely pissed, and it would be a few nightmarish hours of her screaming at me.

– Are you happy with the way your parents support you with your homework? Or do you wish they would handle it differently? Why?

I developed depression and suicidal tendencies in my teens. Today I’m 24, and still battle depression and a lack of discipline. I certainly wish it had been handled differently.

They help when they know I’m having trouble with a certain subject, and when they do they are patient about it. Yes, they have used commands and incentives, and I have gotten grounded, and I used to resent them for that. Now, though, I know that they have only ever wanted what’s best for me, including my education.

My parents rarely help me with my homework. When they do it’s usually because I am stuck on a problem and ask them to help me. Even then sometimes they can not help me because they don’t know how to do it either. When I was younger, my parents would keep a closer eye on the homework situation, and do a lot more to help me. Now it’s my responsibility to get my homework done and handed in on time. Which is good because it helps me get ready for college when they won’t be there to watch over me.

As a student in high school, my parents don’t help me out with my homework. They did help me a lot in elementary school but as time went on, they did not help me because the material was getting a lot harder. In elementary school, they helped me find what 2+2 was but as time went on they didn’t know how to find x if y=x2+9x-12. They helped me dramatically when the material was a lot easier. Once the material became harder, it was harder for them to teach me. At a certain point I couldn’t really ask them to help me because I didn’t want them to feel bad. I knew they tried their hardest to help me but once the material became harder, I had to learn how to teach myself the material. I knew that time would come. I had to start teaching myself once eighth grade came along. The material was getting tougher for the teacher to teach us let alone my parents to teach me. I know my parents tried to help me comprehend the material but they couldn’t do it any more once I went into middle school. They led me to the right direction in elementary school. They taught me a lot of things in elementary school that I carried out in middle school and high school. In eighth grade, they tried teaching me but they were doing it the wrong way. They would try to help me on my homework but once I got into class, all my answers were wrong. They tried helping me but it didn’t work out for my benefit. At a certain point, I had to say that I already did all my homework so they couldn’t try to help me out. I actually did work but not for long. They started asking questions. I always had my homework “finished” before I even got home. They started looking through my homework and found out I was still doing it wrong. I didn’t want to lie to them any more so I wanted to tell them the truth. I told them that they couldn’t help me and I didn’t understand the material. They told me that I should have told them a while ago. They called a tutor for me so I can actually understand what was going on during class. I did get caught lying but looking back at it, I am happy I did because it led me into getting a tutor that actually knew how to teach. My parents tried helping me with my homework but it didn’t really help me.

At sixteen years old my parents rarely help with my homework but when I was younger my parents would help more often. During elementary school, they would help me the most and then a little during middle school but not much. During elementary school when I would have trouble with a math problem they would help me solve it by going through the steps on how to solve the problem. If I was doing English homework and I did not understand what a question was asking my parents would explain what it meant using different words then the question used. These days with the common core curriculum it is going to get harder for parents to help kids with their homework because it is a different way of learning then what they are used to. When I was younger my parents would always encourage me to start my homework as soon as I got home. Ever since then, whenever I get home I always try and start my homework right away and get all of it done. This routine gets hard when sports start because I am not able to get my homework done right after school, because of practice, but whenever practice is over I try and get it done as soon as possible. My parents provide me with motivation to do my homework and also provide assistance when I need help. My parents rarely ever use commands, incentives, threats or surveillance and never do the work themselves. As I have gotten older, the support from my parents dealing with homework has been the same or maybe even increased. They have also encouraged my to do all of my homework, giving it one hundred percent and doing it the best that I can. Homework not only helps with reenforcing what you learned during the day but it can also improve your grade. During elementary school my parents would definitely help with my homework more then they do now because I was younger still needing help with many things. Now they still help me when I need help but they won’t do the problem for me, they will just explain what a question is asking or put a question in different words so it makes more sense for me. Homework rarely ever causes conflict in my family, but if it were to cause conflict it would be because of stress. Sometimes when people have a lot of homework or they are stuck on a problem they don’t know how to do they can have stress which may lead to conflict. I am happy with the way my family supports me with my homework, because they started encouraging homework at a young age which has helped me throughout the years. I always get all my homework done and complete it to the best of my ability.

Doing homework is can be super tough and a big hassle when it’s piled on more and more from each class period. I find it easier to do my homework on my own, but if I ask my parents to help me with something (not math) like proof reading an essay or simple asking them about a phrase or word I can’t remember. I don’t ask for help if it’s not to necessary, but whenever I do, they are always willing to help me get the answer.

i wish they would let me try a little more by myself

1.I usually get very little to no help on my homework from my parents and when they do help me wether or not their help is effective depends on the kind of work. 2. My parents will for the most part help me if I ask them they do not help me develop a routine but I have made myself one. 3. My parents don’t often do anything unless I ask them for help. 4. I had handled thing different than I did now in second and third grade when I started to need help from my parents about when to do my homework my parents for the most part support my changes in how I do home work. 5. Homework does not for the most part cause conflict in my family 6. I am happy with how my parents are handling my homework because it allows me to work independently

1). My parents help me a bit. Not too much though they don’t do it for me. If I don’t understand something they explain and I Usually get it after a few times. They provide me examples.

2). I don’t really have a homework routine. When I ask for help they do help but with a limit I do think that if the teachers are giving the work most kids should know it and not need help.

3). They don’t Usually command or watch me. If I am not doing it and they catch than I loose some autonomy.

4). They have changed there style of helping me with homework. I get more freedom but if I am messing around they get stricter which I find helps me.

5). Homework does cause conflict in my home. When my parents get mad about homework I get upset and turns into a fight.

6). I am happy with the way they handle homework. It helps me and It is sometimes annoying but in the long run it helps me a lot and I think it will help me.

1. My parents help me on my homework sometimes, but when they do they don’t do the work for me they help me figure it out for I can do it for myself.

2. My parents don’t motivate me to do it they just expect me to get it done becasie it’s my responsibility, they will usally help me when I ask them for my help.

3. They never command me or anything because it’s my responsibility and if I decide to not do it I get the punishment from my teachers.

4. My parents handle the homework the same as they did in elementary school, they helped me with my work but they didn’t do the work for me and they expected me to get it done or to know when I have to do it.

5. Homework never causes conflicts in my family because it’s my job to get it done and to self advocate if I don’t understand the homework, or if left it at school. My parents never yelled at me and told me to do my homework.

6. I am happy the way my parents support me with my homework I think nothing could get any better they help me when I need it and they are not looking over my shoulder when I’m doing it they leave it to me.

1.My parents don,t help me that much but they help me if I don,t understand a certain thing on my homework.

2.My Mom has had me develop a homework routine when I get home from school and my Mom is a great motivator to me a lot and she will provide assitence when I ask

3.Of course sometimes my Mom will get annoyed when I’m slow and not really concentrating and will tell to focus back in and hurry up and get it done.

4.My Mom has helped me practically the same way with homework since the 1st grade except I’m more Independant with homework now that I’m older.

5.Homework without a doubt will cause conflicts at home because me and my two sisters both have super busy schedules filled with activities during weeknights

6. I am happy with the way my parents help me with my handle homework,there very nice and patient about it.

Jaylin H 11/17/14 Writing

How ofter do your parents help you?

My parents rarely help me with my homework, if i need any help, which is not a lot, my parents would help me. My parents provide like teaching me how to do this then I got it on my own.

No my parents do not help me with a work routine I usually do my homework at my time when I want too. Yes they do help me and motivate me or provide assistance when I need help anytime.

Yes sometimes they use commands when I’m frustrated and they say come on get your homework done so you wont be so frustrated. Or sometimes they would threaten me if I don’t get my homework done i’m going to have to sit in my room for the rest of the night. If my parents are kind of confused or forget the work that I do they would have to do some of the work themselves.

When I was in kindergarden my dad used to help me every single day with my work and he would tell me to do my homework at this time every single day. So as I gotten older my dad has helped me less and less because he thinks I got this on my own. When I was In elementary school my parents helped me differently because they knew i had trouble in school everyday.

No my homework is not a conflict in my family we are usually calm about it.

Yes i’m happy about how my parents support me because they don’t really give me help because they give me more freedom and i could do this on my own and i’m just happy that they can give me more space while doing my homework.

My parents usually do not help with my homework at all. When my parents help they have almost always learned it a different way and can not help me. When they do it ends up being very confusing and does not work. If I need help I can just go into school early the next day and ask the teacher.

My parents like me to start my homework as soon as I get home. Sometimes that doesn’t happen, it depends on if I have a sport and when it is. For instance, if I have a sport in 20 minutes I’m not going to start my homework, but if I have one in 2 hours I will.

My parents have never really used any treats or surveillance that they are serious about, but if they did I don’t think they would work.

When I was in elementary school my parents used to help me a little. We released it just confused me more so sometimes I would ask my sister to help. Now I just ask my teachers for help in the beginning of the day.

Homework never really causes conflict, I can just finish it by myself and nobody has to get involved.

I’m happy my parents are not involved with my homework if I they where I think it would just be frustrating and confuse me. I’m also happy that the teachers are open to help in my school, or else I don’t know what I would do when it came to homework.

1Q)How much do your parents help with your homework? What kind of help do they provide? 1A) If I’m really struggling my parents will help me by explaining it in way I would understand and show me how to solve it and let me watch them do it than after they would make me do it and once I eventually get it they will leave me to try to finish on my own.

2Q)Do they help you develop a homework routine? Do they help motivate you and provide assistance when you ask? 2A) I don’t really have a homework routine because my scuduale changes everyday, but to help me get it done at a reasonable time each day they will give me reminders to get to work and start it

3Q)Do they ever use commands, incentives, threats or surveillance? Do they ever do the work themselves? 3A) If I’m procrastinating and getting off track my mom will always be there around me to get me back on track and even sometimes threat me to get it done or she won’t let me go to sports practice later on if I don’t complete my homework.

4Q)Has the way your parents have supported you with homework changed as you have gotten older? Did they handle homework differently when you were in elementary school, for example? 4A) Yes because when I was in elementary school they would help me a lot more and always be by my side while doing it an doing it with me. Now it’s more my job and on me to be getting it done and doing it alone.

5Q)Does homework ever cause conflict in your family? How so? 5A) Yes because if we all need help at the same time my parents can’t help all of us at the same time and I get home really late from practice and that causes a lot of homework conflicts in everyone.

6Q) Are you happy with the way your parents support you with your homework? Or do you wish they would handle it differently? Why? 6A) Yes I am because If I need help they will help me and make sure I get it.

If I am having a lot of trouble with my homework my mom or dad will give me an example to guide me with the rest of the work but they mostly want me to be independent. I never really had a problem making a H.W. routine or being motivated because I know it is just life you need to do homework. Because of this they have never had to threaten me and certainly never did my H.W for me. Even in my elementry school years my parents have always had the same values about working hard and being independent with my H.W. Unfortunatly, my sister is a huge precrasinater and is always on her phone and there has been huge conflicts when it is nine thirty at night and she has only gotten one page done. I am very happy with the way my parents have handled homework because it has shaped my good homework habits I have today.

Jason H 11/17/14 Literature/Writing A/P How Much Do Your Parents Help With Your Homework?

My parents only help me with my homework when I’m really stuck on a a problem or when I’m trouble understanding a question. Other then that my parents don’t help me with my homework. My parents do not help me develop a homework routine. It is automatic for me to come home and start my homework. Yes, my parents help motivate me and provide assistant when I ask. I ask for assistant when I don’t understand a question. No, my parents don’t ever use commands, incentives, threats or surveillance. No, they don’t ever do the work themselves. They would give me examples but not do the work. The way my parents have supported me with my homework has changed as I gotten older. It has changed as I gotten older because when I was much younger I would need a lot of help figuring the questions on my homework and now since I have gotten older I don’t need as much help with my homework. Yes, my parents handled homework differently when I was in elementary for example, my mom would sometimes sit next to me incase I would need help. After fourth and fifth grade my parents haven’t been sitting next to me just incase I would need help. I have been doing my homework on my own. No, homework doesn’t cause a conflict in my family. yes, I am happy the way my parents support me with my homework. I am happy with the way they support me because they don’t ask me if I got all my homework done. They know that I am responsible enough to get my homework done.

My parents help me a lot to finish my homework. They don’t really finish the entire homework for me .The only thing what they do for me whenever I find any problem to finish my homework and they only do that specific part for me and I don’t think that they should help me to finish the entire homework. They help me to develop a homework routine. Yes, they motivate me and provide assistance when I ask. They do use commands and incentives but not the other options. They don’t ever do the work themselves for me. No the way didn’t changed when I got older .yes they changed the way they liked to handle homework differently when i was in elementary school. No homework don’t really cause any conflict in my family because my parents are really cooperative to each other and in my case they are really responsible .Yes, I am happy with my parents support and in my opinion I think sometime they help me to finish the homework in Sunday night for the Monday school and it makes me thinking throughout the weekend but I wish if they would helped me Friday night in place of Sunday night for Monday school.at the end I would like say that I am really happy to have such an helpful parents.

For me my parents help me to do nothing with my homework, because they always tell me that is your homework. When I was some confused for homework they often give me prompt. No they don’t help me develop a homework routine. Yes when I ask them, they motivate me and provide assistance me. They never use threats and surveillance for me. I think do they ever do the work themselves, so they don’t do for me. Yes they supported me with homework changed as me have gotten older. When I was in elementary school, my parents handle math and Languages homework. Yes, does the homework ever cause conflict in my family, because for one question we have different opinion so does homework ever cause in my family. Yes I am happy with the way my parents support me with my homework, because if they don’t support me do homework, I think I will lose many happy things.

I strongly believe that parents should help their child with their homework, they can give them clue or tray to explain in an easier way to go through it, so they can do it themselves. I agree that Parents should not do the homework for their children because they’re not helping them to learn, I believe that kids in young age like six or seven, parents should teach them how to do it, so that can benefit kids in the long run. at the end When they grow, or become adult they will be capable to do any homework in school or college without their parents do it for them.

I think that when parents help their children, everything is going to be ok. Parent’s help all the time is necessary because when parents support their children the children get more motivation. Sometimes is not easy to get parent’s help because usually parents are working. If we want that our children do better in school we have to help them do their homework. Sometime when parents say something good to student we get motivation because we think that we aren’t alone in our run to college. I’m a student and sometimes is very difficult to tell my father that I need some help because sometimes he is very tired. Usually he says that I can do what I want, when he says that I feel so comfortable because I think that he is next to me. When parents give advice to their children and support them student do better in schools, colleges, and in different ways of our life.

As a mother, I love to be involved in with my son’s homework, he is kindergarten, so he needs it. I encourage him to it and he does it before he watches his favorite show on TV. Initially he didn’t like to do it, today he has fun doing it, I noticed that he had gained confidence because I usually post some of his work on the door of the refrigerator. I think he likes it. I noticed that he has gained confidence because he talks with the family about it, I hope, he will do it with less supervision. I think it is very important to help children with homework and teach them to love it

When I was in elementary school my father helped me to do my homework. My father helped me to learn English and mathematics. But my mother was always busy with household works because our family was joint family. We lived in a big house with many other cousins and uncles family. That’s why my father always helped me in my study. He gave me a homework routine. He also gave vocabulary list. He always gave warning to finish homework. What I progress in my life because of my father. He always wants that I and my siblings become a successful person. Without his inspiration I did not come here. My father is an angry person that’s why I finished my homework every day. When I was in high school he didn’t support the way he liked to do in my elementary school. I handled my homework alone. In my family home work does not create conflict. Yes, I am happy with my parents support.

I am mother, I have 3 kids, they are 17, 4, and 7 years old. I think that the parents have a lot of responsibility with the children. we need to help to kids when they don’t understand or when they need our collaboration because they feel better when we help to them. Is different to do than to help. They need more responsibilities in their homework, but when are kids, sometimes they don’t concentrate in homework. When they have any homework but they need my help of course, I help and give them necessary resource for develop their homework . I am very happy with my children because we are a set, we are united. For this reason we can help betwen ourselves. We have good supporting in our home because my oldest daughter help his brother with homework. In my home we try to buy different books or we have a web page with instruments necessaries for to do exercise in topics when they need help.

How much do your parents help with your homework? What kind of help do they provide? My parents helped me a lot, when I was child. Sometime when I couldn’t do some assignments like math, or other things, they were there to help me. Even now they help me although they do not know English they help me in Spanish. In my opinion when the parents help the children to do their homework everything is going to be better. Sometime the parents do not pay attention about their children, sometime when children need some help and their parents do not help them, the children will have some problems

How much do your parents help with your homework? What kind of help do they provide? My parents helped me a lot, when I was child. Sometime when I couldn’t do some assignments like math, or other things, they were there to help me. Even now they help me although they do not know English they help me in Spanish. In my opinion when the parents help the children to do their homework everything is going to be better. Sometime the parents do not pay attention about their children, sometime when children need some help and their parents do not help them, the children will have some problems.

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How to make school life a little less difficult for kids

Actually useful ways to help children with homework, bullying, and mental health.

by Allie Volpe

In early 2020, around the onset of Covid-19 lockdowns, Jessica Mungekar noticed her seventh grade honor student, Layla, retreat. “I knew that she felt really uncomfortable and she wanted to fall into the background,” Mungekar says. “She didn’t want to be noticed and I didn’t quite understand it.”

Meanwhile, Layla was keeping the source of her pain secret from her mother: She was being bullied and was struggling with her identity as a biracial teen in a predominantly white town. Layla feared if she told her mom about the extent of the bullying, Jessica would have called the school, making the problem even worse.

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Things came to a head the summer before Layla’s first year of high school when she shared with her mom details of a traumatic event. Layla urged her mother not to make decisions on her behalf in the aftermath. Instead, Jessica went into what she calls “mama bear mode” and made demands of her daughter: Cut off contact with these friends, join these extracurricular activities, you are only allowed out of the house during these hours. Layla felt like her autonomy was being taken away.

Over the course of a few months, mother and daughter worked to repair their relationship and communication. Now, Jessica says she is sure to listen to Layla instead of immediately offering advice, validates her daughter’s feelings, and gives her freedom to express herself. For her part, Layla confides in her mother all the time, even about her dating life. Her friends often seek out Jessica for counsel, too. “She’s become a safe place where people go to get advice,” Layla, now 16, says. “She’s joyous and doesn’t pass judgment.”

Students are faced with a daily barrage of potential stressors: a demanding course load, tricky social dynamics, managing both their time and emotions. In a four-year study designed to estimate the prevalence of mental disorders in kindergarteners through 12th graders, findings showed one in six students exhibited enough symptoms to meet the criteria for one or more childhood mental disorders, such as anxiety disorders and attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder. According to a 2019 Pew Research Center report, 61 percent of teens said they felt a lot of pressure to get good grades. About 22 percent of 12- to 18-year-old students reported being bullied during the school year in 2019, per a National Center for Education Statistics survey . None of these statistics takes into account the toll of the pandemic, which set students back academically and had negative effects on their mental health .

Once kids leave the house, parents and other adults in their lives have little influence on their students’ school days. Unable to witness or guide children through the difficulties in and out of the classroom, parents often get piecemeal or incomplete views of how their kids spent the last hours, especially if the child is young and can’t adequately verbalize their struggles or frustrations. Signs that a student may be experiencing hardship at school include increased irritability, difficulty sleeping or lack of sleep, and changes in appetite, says Jessica Kendorski , the chair of the school psychology department and professor at the Philadelphia College of Osteopathic Medicine. They may also say they feel sick in order to stay home, when in reality they may be stressed or anxious about school, Kendorski says.

Another indicator of a struggling child includes extreme people-pleasing, says Meredith Draughn , the school counselor at B. Everett Jordan Elementary School in Graham, NC, and the 2023 American School Counselor Association Counselor of the Year. High school students may also exhibit a “freeze” response, Draughn says. “It’s like well, that kid just doesn’t care, right? That kid’s super apathetic,” she says. “What we find when we dig into it more is they’re so overwhelmed by everything that’s happening that they just choose to do nothing because they don’t know how to address it.”

What, then, is the right way to support the students in your life? The tactics will vary based on the age of your child and the issues they’re facing. Regardless of your approach, experts say to always keep your kids in the loop of any decisions you’re making about their emotional and academic success.

Encourage growth mindset tactics for academic achievement

From homework to challenging classes, students experience a number of academic hurdles. Sometimes, they may fail a test or drop the ball on a project. While some students may criticize themselves (“I’m not smart enough”) or claim the material was too difficult, parents should promote a growth mindset : the ability to learn from setbacks, implement new processes, and improve. “You want to praise the effort and the strategies that they used,” Kendorski says. “If they fail something, you want to talk through ‘Why did you fail this? Let’s talk about what you can do to be successful next time.’”

A fixed mindset is one where people believe their skills are set in stone and they have no possibility of improving. When students in his classroom share fixed mindset sentiments like “I can’t do this,” elementary school teacher Josh Monroe is quick to amend the statement: “You can’t do this yet .” The power of yet helps students “understand that you don’t have to know it all right now — and it’s important that you don’t, that’s how you grow,” he says.

While it’s crucial to encourage a growth mindset with students who use negative self-talk, like “I’ll never learn this” or “I’m not good enough,” a fixed mindset can also backfire if you constantly tell a student “You’re so smart,” Kendorski says. “When things start to get really difficult, you might find kids that don’t want to take chances,” she says, “because they think that if I fail, I’m going to lose that ‘I’m so smart’ title.” Instead, she says, focus on accomplishments based on effort and strategies: “I’m really proud of you for organizing a study group with your friends.”

To help ensure your kids get their homework done and prepare for tests, Kendorski encourages a routine: dedicating a time and a place for schoolwork. If your student retains information more effectively if they study for a little bit each day instead of cramming, offer that as an option.

When the kid in your life asks for help with homework and you’re a little rusty on, say, algebra, don’t feel ashamed to admit you don’t know how to solve the problem, Draughn says. Monroe recommends the online educational tool Khan Academy , which features videos that guide both parents and students through all levels of educational concepts and lessons. For additional academic resources, reach out to your student’s teacher who will know about after-school tutoring sessions or extra guidance, Draughn says. “Going to teachers early and often, when help is needed, is the most crucial part of it,” she says, “because there are those programs, but they do fill up pretty quickly.”

Empower students to navigate difficult social situations with confidence

School can be a social minefield, with kids learning how to independently interact with peers and regulate their emotions. If your child shares that they’re being picked on or ostracized in school, Draughn suggests that you first validate their experience and never downplay their emotions. Ask them what level of support they want: Do they think it would be helpful to talk to a school counselor or a teacher? Or do they prefer you to reach out to the teacher directly? In Layla Mungekar’s experience, she would have opted for her mother to not interfere with her social life. “Letting them lead the way on that is important,” Draughn says. “They may say, I feel like I have the tools to handle this — and that’s great. Then you check in. But doing nothing and just not mentioning it again is not going to help anything.”

You might also start counseling your kid on self-advocacy and assertiveness at home, too, Draughn says, helping them identify moments where they should speak out against bad behavior and pointing out trustworthy adults to whom they can report issues, regardless of whether they are on the receiving end or have witnessed another student being bullied. “If someone is making you feel socially or physically unsafe, that’s the time to speak up,” says Tracee Perryman , the author of Elevating Futures: A Model For Empowering Black Elementary Student Success . Again, only reach out to the school yourself after talking it over with your kid.

However, your child may simply be shy and reserved, not the victim of bullying. Perryman says to help build confidence with the kids in your life by reminding them that what they have to say is important and they have valuable interests and insights worth sharing with others.

When it comes to social media, Jessica Mungekar discovered teens will “do what they’re going to do, whether you want them to or not,” she says. It’s better to listen if your child is involved with social media-related conflict, remind them they are not in trouble, and support them as you work to create a plan together. “I think it’s important in this day and age for kids to have social media because otherwise they get [alienated] by their peers,” Layla Mungekar says. “But it’s a lot safer when parents have those conversations, like yeah, this is going to happen and when it does happen, you should feel safe to come to me and not be blamed for that.”

Experts emphasize the transitory nature of school. While it’s crucial for students to apply themselves academically and make strides socially, remind them that one speed bump, fight with a friend, blunder, or bad grade will not drastically alter the trajectory of their lives. “It’s better that I make those mistakes now,” Layla says, “while I have someone there to help me.”

Promote balance to minimize stress

Just like adults, kids can get stressed due to the demands of school and extracurriculars, as well as conflicts with friends and family. If kids are sleeping very late on weekends or too tired to do activities they typically enjoy, like spending time with friends, they might need more balance in their schedules, Perryman says.

Ask your kid directly: “Are you playing T-ball three nights a week because you like it or you feel like you have to?” or “You had three extracurriculars last semester and it was really overwhelming for you. Do you want to pick two for this coming semester?” Draughn suggests. Remind your kid that just because they step away from a hobby now doesn’t mean they can’t come back to it in the future. Make sure students have one weeknight and one weekend day solely devoted to downtime, too, Draughn says. However, don’t discount the fact that sports and other activities can be rejuvenating for kids, even if they’re not resting.

Parents and supportive adults are quick to problem-solve for the kids in their lives, but Kendorski stresses the importance of asking, “Do you want me to listen? Or do you want me to help?” Your child might just want to vent about a tough baseball practice. When Layla wants validation and a hug from her mom, she asks her “to be a waterfall.” When she’s feeling less emotionally charged, then Layla and her mom can problem-solve.

For high-achieving students who may be stressed about grades and college applications, Kendorski suggests asking your kids what story they’re telling themselves about success. For example, they might worry that a bad test grade means they’ll never get into their dream college. Help them map more realistic outcomes by thinking about the absolute worst-case scenario and alternative paths. For example, the worst that could happen if they fail a single test is maybe they get a C for the quarter. But reinforce how if they study and complete all their homework, the likelihood of failing is minimized.

Remember not to make your stress their stress. Children are intuitive and can pick up on how the adults in their lives are feeling, Kendorski says. Instead of turning away from uncomfortable emotions, encourage open communication. If you’re disappointed in a mediocre grade, try saying, “I’m feeling a little bummed about the C on that test, but that’s my issue. I know you work hard and with some more practice, I know you’ll do better next time.”

Parents should always validate their child’s struggles and encourage caring for their mental health. Whether they’re seeking support from a trusted teacher or you think they’d benefit from speaking with a therapist — ask them how they’d feel about chatting with a professional before scheduling an appointment — remind them that “mental health is health,” Draughn says. That matters more than any test score.

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How to help your child with their homework.

Helping your child with their homework can be tricky to navigate. While it’s hard to see your child struggle through difficult tasks, they won’t learn anything if you do their work for them!

Here’s what learning science research and IXL experts have to say about the best way to help out with homework, as well as a few IXL features that can support you along the way.

Tips for helping your child with their homework

The Harvard Graduate School of Education suggests thinking of yourself as a homework project manager for your kids. This means you should focus on helping your child to develop a good process for doing homework, rather than assisting with the actual assignments themselves. Some practical ways you can do this are by:

• helping your child make a to-do list
• helping them estimate how much time it’ll take to complete each assignment
• encouraging them to stay on-task
• praising them when they finish their work!

If possible, have your child do homework in a communal space, like at the kitchen table. This ensures that you can be nearby for support if needed. If you have other children or your child has friends who live in the neighborhood, it can be beneficial for them all to do homework together. Homework can feel like a lonely task, and turning it into a communal activity can help make it more fun!

Homework help tips from IXL experts

Members of IXL’s team also weighed in on their top strategies for helping children with homework. Maureen Schrader, a former teacher with 18 years of experience in education, said, “You want students to take as much ownership of their learning as possible.” Homework is an opportunity for learners to develop executive functioning skills and demonstrate responsibility. To that end, parents should “set their child up for success by providing a good learning space and organizational tools, like a whiteboard calendar.”

Similarly, former teacher and instructional coach Sheila Berger suggested parents try to make a clean, quiet, and comfortable space at home for their child to work. She also warned against parents acting like a “back seat driver” for their child’s homework, saying, “If they need help finding something, help them without doing it for them, so they can do it alone next time.”

IXL tools for homework help

IXL offers a variety of features to help students learn and practice skills! Here are some tools that you can try out with your child if they need homework assistance. If your child is a bit older, they can use these tools to learn more independently while you step back and supervise.

Learn with an example

Before an activity, it always helps to see a demonstration of what you’re supposed to do. When starting a math or English language arts skill, encourage your child to select “Learn with an Example” to see an example question, a step-by-step walkthrough of how to find the answer, and an explanation of the key concepts within the topic. Going through this example together can help your child see how a skill works and prime them for practicing!

Answer explanations

It can be frustrating to get a question wrong, but mistakes are also great opportunities to learn! If a student answers a question incorrectly, IXL provides a step-by-step explanation of how to correctly answer that specific question. This hands-on practice combined with immediate feedback gives learners a strong base to learn from their errors and try again on the next question. Remind your child to read through explanations carefully before they move on to the next problem!

Overall, the best thing you can do is provide support and guidance for your child while they handle their homework. This will help them develop problem-solving skills, content knowledge, and confidence.

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The 5 Best Homework Help Websites (Free and Paid!)

Other High School , General Education

Listen: we know homework isn’t fun, but it is a good way to reinforce the ideas and concepts you’ve learned in class. But what if you’re really struggling with your homework assignments?

If you’ve looked online for a little extra help with your take-home assignments, you’ve probably stumbled across websites claiming to provide the homework help and answers students need to succeed . But can homework help sites really make a difference? And if so, which are the best homework help websites you can use? 

Below, we answer these questions and more about homework help websites–free and paid. We’ll go over: 

• The basics of homework help websites
• The cost of homework help websites 
• The five best homework websites out there 
• The pros and cons of using these websites for homework help 
• The line between “learning” and “cheating” when using online homework help 
• Tips for getting the most out of a homework help website

So let’s get started! 

The Basics About Homework Help Websites–Free and Paid

Homework help websites are designed to help you complete your homework assignments, plain and simple. 

What Makes a Homework Help Site Worth Using

Most of the best sites allow users to ask questions and then provide an answer (or multiple possible answers) and explanation in seconds. In some instances, you can even send a photo of a particular assignment or problem instead of typing the whole thing out! 

Homework help sites also offer more than just help answering homework questions. Common services provided are Q&A with experts, educational videos, lectures, practice tests and quizzes, learning modules, math solving tools, and proofreading help. Homework help sites can also provide textbook solutions (i.e. answers to problems in tons of different textbooks your school might be using), one-on-one tutoring, and peer-to-peer platforms that allow you to discuss subjects you’re learning about with your fellow students. 

And best of all, nearly all of them offer their services 24/7, including tutoring! 

What You Should Should Look Out For

When it comes to homework help, there are lots–and we mean lots –of scam sites out there willing to prey on desperate students. Before you sign up for any service, make sure you read reviews to ensure you’re working with a legitimate company. 

A word to the wise: the more a company advertises help that veers into the territory of cheating, the more likely it is to be a scam. The best homework help websites are going to help you learn the concepts you’ll need to successfully complete your homework on your own. (We’ll go over the difference between “homework help” and “cheating” a little later!) 

You don't need a golden piggy bank to use homework help websites. Some provide low or no cost help for students like you!

How Expensive Are the Best Homework Help Websites?

First of all, just because a homework help site costs money doesn’t mean it’s a good service. Likewise, just because a homework help website is free doesn’t mean the help isn’t high quality. To find the best websites, you have to take a close look at the quality and types of information they provide! 

When it comes to paid homework help services, the prices vary pretty widely depending on the amount of services you want to subscribe to. Subscriptions can cost anywhere from $2 to $150 dollars per month, with the most expensive services offering several hours of one-on-one tutoring with a subject expert per month.

The 5 Best Homework Help Websites 

So, what is the best homework help website you can use? The answer is that it depends on what you need help with. 

The best homework help websites are the ones that are reliable and help you learn the material. They don’t just provide answers to homework questions–they actually help you learn the material. 

That’s why we’ve broken down our favorite websites into categories based on who they’re best for . For instance, the best website for people struggling with math might not work for someone who needs a little extra help with science, and vice versa. 

Keep reading to find the best homework help website for you! 

Best Free Homework Help Site: Khan Academy

• Price: Free!
• Best for: Practicing tough material 

Not only is Khan Academy free, but it’s full of information and can be personalized to suit your needs. When you set up your account , you choose which courses you need to study, and Khan Academy sets up a personal dashboard of instructional videos, practice exercises, and quizzes –with both correct and incorrect answer explanations–so you can learn at your own pace. 

As an added bonus, it covers more course topics than many other homework help sites, including several AP classes.

Runner Up: Brainly.com offers a free service that allows you to type in questions and get answers and explanations from experts. The downside is that you’re limited to two answers per question and have to watch ads. 

Best Paid Homework Help Site: Chegg

• Price: $14.95 to $19.95 per month
• Best for: 24/7 homework assistance  

This service has three main parts . The first is Chegg Study, which includes textbook solutions, Q&A with subject experts, flashcards, video explanations, a math solver, and writing help. The resources are thorough, and reviewers state that Chegg answers homework questions quickly and accurately no matter when you submit them.  

Chegg also offers textbook rentals for students who need access to textbooks outside of their classroom. Finally, Chegg offers Internship and Career Advice for students who are preparing to graduate and may need a little extra help with the transition out of high school. 

Another great feature Chegg provides is a selection of free articles geared towards helping with general life skills, like coping with stress and saving money. Chegg’s learning modules are comprehensive, and they feature solutions to the problems in tons of different textbooks in a wide variety of subjects. 

Runner Up: Bartleby offers basically the same services as Chegg for $14.99 per month. The reason it didn’t rank as the best is based on customer reviews that say user questions aren’t answered quite as quickly on this site as on Chegg. Otherwise, this is also a solid choice!

Best Site for Math Homework Help: Photomath

• Price: Free (or $59.99 per year for premium services) 
• Best for: Explaining solutions to math problems

This site allows you to t ake a picture of a math problem, and instantly pulls up a step-by-step solution, as well as a detailed explanation of the concept. Photomath also includes animated videos that break down mathematical concepts to help you better understand and remember them. 

The basic service is free, but for an additional fee you can get extra study tools and learn additional strategies for solving common math problems.

Runner Up: KhanAcademy offers in-depth tutorials that cover complex math topics for free, but you won’t get the same tailored help (and answers!) that Photomath offers. 

Best Site for English Homework Help: Princeton Review Academic Tutoring

• Price: $40 to $153 per month, depending on how many hours of tutoring you want 
• Best for: Comprehensive and personalized reading and writing help 

While sites like Grammarly and Sparknotes help you by either proofreading what you write via an algorithm or providing book summaries, Princeton Review’s tutors provide in-depth help with vocabulary, literature, essay writing and development, proofreading, and reading comprehension. And unlike other services, you’ll have the chance to work with a real person to get help. 

The best part is that you can get on-demand English (and ESL) tutoring from experts 24/7. That means you can get help whenever you need it, even if you’re pulling an all-nighter! 

This is by far the most expensive homework site on this list, so you’ll need to really think about what you need out of a homework help website before you commit. One added benefit is that the subscription covers over 80 other subjects, including AP classes, which can make it a good value if you need lots of help!  

Best Site for STEM Homework Help: Studypool

• Best for: Science homework help
• Price: Varies; you’ll pay for each question you submit

When it comes to science homework help, there aren’t a ton of great resources out there. The best of the bunch is Studypool, and while it has great reviews, there are some downsides as well. 

Let’s start with the good stuff. Studypool offers an interesting twist on the homework help formula. After you create a free account, you can submit your homework help questions, and tutors will submit bids to answer your questions. You’ll be able to select the tutor–and price point–that works for you, then you’ll pay to have your homework question answered. You can also pay a small fee to access notes, lectures, and other documents that top tutors have uploaded. 

The downside to Studypool is that the pricing is not transparent . There’s no way to plan for how much your homework help will cost, especially if you have lots of questions! Additionally, it’s not clear how tutors are selected, so you’ll need to be cautious when you choose who you’d like to answer your homework questions.  

What Are the Pros and Cons of Using Homework Help Sites?

Homework help websites can be a great resource if you’re struggling in a subject, or even if you just want to make sure that you’re really learning and understanding topics and ideas that you’re interested in. But, there are some possible drawbacks if you don’t use these sites responsibly. 

We’ll go over the good–and the not-so-good–aspects of getting online homework help below. 

3 Pros of Using Homework Help Websites 

First, let’s take a look at the benefits. 

#1: Better Grades Beyond Homework

This is a big one! Getting outside help with your studies can improve your understanding of concepts that you’re learning, which translates into better grades when you take tests or write essays. 

Remember: homework is designed to help reinforce the concepts you learned in class. If you just get easy answers without learning the material behind the problems, you may not have the tools you need to be successful on your class exams…or even standardized tests you’ll need to take for college. 

#2: Convenience

One of the main reasons that online homework help is appealing is because it’s flexible and convenient. You don’t have to go to a specific tutoring center while they’re open or stay after school to speak with your teacher. Instead, you can access helpful resources wherever you can access the internet, whenever you need them.

This is especially true if you tend to study at off hours because of your extracurriculars, work schedule, or family obligations. Sites that offer 24/7 tutoring can give you the extra help you need if you can’t access the free resources that are available at your school. 

#3: Variety

Not everyone learns the same way. Maybe you’re more of a visual learner, but your teacher mostly does lectures. Or maybe you learn best by listening and taking notes, but you’re expected to learn something just from reading the textbook . 

One of the best things about online homework help is that it comes in a variety of forms. The best homework help sites offer resources for all types of learners, including videos, practice activities, and even one-on-one discussions with real-life experts. 

This variety can also be a good thing if you just don’t really resonate with the way a concept is being explained (looking at you, math textbooks!).

Not so fast. There are cons to homework help websites, too. Get to know them below!

3 Cons of Using Homework Help Websites 

Now, let’s take a look at the drawbacks of online homework help. 

#1: Unreliable Info

This can be a real problem. In addition to all the really good homework help sites, there are a whole lot of disreputable or unreliable sites out there. The fact of the matter is that some homework help sites don’t necessarily hire people who are experts in the subjects they’re talking about. In those cases, you may not be getting the accurate, up-to-date, and thorough information you need.

Additionally, even the great sites may not be able to answer all of your homework questions. This is especially true if the site uses an algorithm or chatbot to help students…or if you’re enrolled in an advanced or college-level course. In these cases, working with your teacher or school-provided tutors are probably your best option. 

#2: No Clarification

This depends on the service you use, of course. But the majority of them provide free or low-cost help through pre-recorded videos. Watching videos or reading info online can definitely help you with your homework… but you can’t ask questions or get immediate feedback if you need it .

#3: Potential For Scamming 

Like we mentioned earlier, there are a lot of homework help websites out there, and lots of them are scams. The review comments we read covered everything from outdated or wrong information, to misleading claims about the help provided, to not allowing people to cancel their service after signing up. 

No matter which site you choose to use, make sure you research and read reviews before you sign up–especially if it’s a paid service! 

When Does “Help” Become “Cheating”?

Admittedly, whether using homework help websites constitutes cheating is a bit of a grey area. For instance, is it “help” when a friend reads your essay for history class and corrects your grammar, or is it “cheating”? The truth is, not everyone agrees on when “help” crosses the line into “cheating .” When in doubt, it can be a good idea to check with your teacher to see what they think about a particular type of help you want to get. 

That said, a general rule of thumb to keep in mind is to make sure that the assignment you turn in for credit is authentically yours . It needs to demonstrate your own thoughts and your own current abilities. Remember: the point of every homework assignment is to 1) help you learn something, and 2) show what you’ve learned. 

So if a service answers questions or writes essays for you, there’s a good chance using it constitutes cheating. 

Here’s an example that might help clarify the difference for you. Brainstorming essay ideas with others or looking online for inspiration is “help” as long as you write the essay yourself. Having someone read it and give you feedback about what you need to change is also help, provided you’re the one that makes the changes later. 

But copying all or part of an essay you find online or having someone write (or rewrite) the whole thing for you would be “cheating.” The same is true for other subjects. Ultimately, if you’re not generating your own work or your own answers, it’s probably cheating.

5 Tips for Finding the Best Homework Help Websites for You

Now that you know some of our favorite homework help websites, free and paid, you can start doing some additional research on your own to decide which services might work best for you! Here are some top tips for choosing a homework help website. 

Tip 1: Decide How You Learn Best 

Before you decide which site or sites you’re going to use for homework help, y ou should figure out what kind of learning style works for you the most. Are you a visual learner? Then choose a site that uses lots of videos to help explain concepts. If you know you learn best by actually doing tasks, choose a site that provides lots of practice exercises.

Tip 2: Determine Which Subjects You Need Help With

Just because a homework help site is good overall doesn’t mean that it’s equally good for every subject. If you only need help in math, choose a site that specializes in that area. But if history is where you’re struggling, a site that specializes in math won’t be much help. So make sure to choose a site that you know provides high-quality help in the areas you need it most. 

Tip 3: Decide How Much One-On-One Help You Need 

This is really about cost-effectiveness. If you learn well on your own by reading and watching videos, a free site like Khan Academy is a good choice. But if you need actual tutoring, or to be able to ask questions and get personalized answers from experts, a paid site that provides that kind of service may be a better option.

Tip 4: Set a Budget

If you decide you want to go with a paid homework help website, set a budget first . The prices for sites vary wildly, and the cost to use them can add up quick. 

Tip 5: Read the Reviews

Finally, it’s always a good idea to read actual reviews written by the people using these homework sites. You’ll learn the good, the bad, and the ugly of what the users’ experiences have been. This is especially true if you intend to subscribe to a paid service. You’ll want to make sure that users think it’s worth the price overall!

What’s Next?

If you want to get good grades on your homework, it’s a good idea to learn how to tackle it strategically. Our expert tips will help you get the most out of each assignment…and boost your grades in the process.

Doing well on homework assignments is just one part of getting good grades. We’ll teach you everything you need to know about getting great grades in high school in this article.

Of course, test grades can make or break your GPA, too. Here are 17 expert tips that’ll help you get the most out of your study prep before you take an exam.

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Ashley Sufflé Robinson has a Ph.D. in 19th Century English Literature. As a content writer for PrepScholar, Ashley is passionate about giving college-bound students the in-depth information they need to get into the school of their dreams.

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